“Letting go.” It’s a phrase we hear often, isn’t it? We’re advised to let go of stress, let go of worries, let go of things that no longer serve us. It sounds simple, but if you’ve ever tried to consciously “let go” of a deeply ingrained habit or a persistent tension, you know it can be surprisingly tricky. Our bodies and minds are masters of holding on, often for very good reasons, even if those reasons are no longer relevant.
In my bodywork practice, I see this dance between holding and letting go every day. So much of the discomfort we experience – the tight shoulders, the stiff necks, the aching backs – comes from patterns of holding. We hold tension from physical exertion, from emotional stress, from habitual postures, even from old beliefs about ourselves and the world. This holding isn’t a conscious choice, most of the time. It’s the body’s way of trying to protect us, to keep us stable, or to manage overwhelming input. But over time, these holding patterns can become restrictive, limiting our movement, our breath, and even our sense of vitality.
The beautiful thing is that our bodies also have an innate capacity to let go, to release, to return to a state of ease. Bodywork can be a powerful way to remind the body of this capacity and to gently coax it out of its well-worn holding patterns. It’s not about forcing a release, because forcing often just creates more resistance. Instead, it’s about creating the right conditions – safety, trust, and gentle invitation – for the body to choose to let go.
Think of a clenched fist. If you try to pry the fingers open with force, they might resist even more. But if you were to gently cradle that fist, to bring warmth and softness to it, to patiently wait, the fingers might begin to unfurl on their own, when they feel safe enough to do so. My approach to bodywork is much like that. I use different kinds of touch – sometimes very light and subtle, sometimes more specific and deep – to communicate with the tissues, to invite them to soften, to lengthen, to release their grip.
One of the key elements in this process is awareness. Often, we’re not even fully aware of where we’re holding tension until a gentle hand brings our attention to it. “Oh, I didn’t realize my jaw was so tight!” or “I had no idea I was holding my breath like that.” This moment of recognition is crucial. Once we become aware of a holding pattern, we have a choice. We can’t consciously let go of something we don’t even know we’re holding onto.
During a session, I might guide you to breathe into an area of tension, or to notice the sensations there without judgment. This isn’t about trying to make the tension disappear immediately. It’s about bringing a curious, accepting presence to it. What does it feel like? Is it sharp or dull? Does it change as you breathe? This gentle, focused attention can, in itself, begin to shift the pattern. It’s like shining a soft light into a forgotten corner; the darkness naturally recedes.
It’s also important to understand that “letting go” isn’t a one-time event, especially for patterns that have been with us for a long time. It’s more like peeling an onion, layer by layer. A session might help to release one layer of holding, bringing a sense of relief and greater ease. And then, in daily life, with increased awareness, you might start to notice when that old pattern tries to creep back in, and you’ll have new tools – perhaps a conscious breath, a small adjustment in posture, or a moment of mindful softening – to meet it differently.
This is why I often say that while I can help relieve tension, lasting change comes when you are “open to challenge their belief system and practice and repeat the new ideas, movements, attitudes that they discover.” The bodywork session can be a catalyst, a reminder of what ease feels like, and an inspiration to cultivate that ease more consistently.
The feeling of letting go in the body can be incredibly liberating. It’s not just about less pain; it’s about more freedom. Freedom to move with greater fluidity, freedom to breathe more deeply, freedom to feel more present and alive in your own skin. It’s like setting down a heavy weight you didn’t even realize you were carrying. And in that newfound lightness, there’s more space for joy, for creativity, and for simply being.
If you feel like you’re carrying around old tensions or stuck in patterns of holding, perhaps a bodywork session could be an invitation to explore the art of letting go. It’s a gentle journey, taken at your body’s own pace, towards a greater sense of freedom and well-being.
